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Thursday, December 31, 2009

Soya Jelly

The original recipe for soya jelly is given by Swearly, you may try your own measurement, but if you sick of trying and trying, I encourage you to follow her instruction, and measurement, for the best taste, get those ingredient as she recommended, because she really have given many trying on different measurements, brands and products, enjoy the making.


2 ltr Water
1 litre V-Soy Soya Bean Milk
1 Packet Pearl Mermaid Agar-agar (jelly) powder 25g in a sachet
1 litre Marigold full cream milk
1 1/2 cups of sugar
12 pcs Pandan leaves
2 cans of Hosen Longan in Syrup


1) Add 2 ltr of water, together with sugar and pandan leaves, boil until the sugar melt totally.

2) Pour in Marigold full cream milk and V-soy soya bean milk.

3) Dissolve Pearl Mermaid Agar-agar (jelly) powder with cold (50ml) water before added in to soya bean mixture, then continue to stir until it is boiled. Turn off the fire, leave it for cooling, take out the surface layer of thin layer of soya skin (you may want to eat it, because it tastes nice!)

4) Fill in the cups ( makes about 27 - 30 small cups ) and leave them for hardening.

5) Scoop in two Longan to each cup after the jelly is formed.

I was foolish

Recent lesson requires a God fearing heart, how foolish am I if I let Him down, I am so fierce, so fierce to block God's advice, so 'strong', so 'strong' to push God away, at once I can see how ugly I was, how lonely, how restless, how vulnerable... without Him.

Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Beauty Tips

Beauty tips

by poh fang chia

Posted under God's empowerment, christian living, daily devotional, decisions/choices, humility, self-image

Proverbs 31:10-31
Charm is deceptive, and beauty does not last; but a woman who fears the Lord will be greatly praised. (v.30).

Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise (Philippians 4:8).

How could you clothe yourself with a gentle and quiet spirit today? What does it take to reflect God’s beauty?

Not long ago, we had a discussion in our office regarding what you should eat based on your blood type. Suddenly, our lunchtime conversations were seasoned with questions like: “If I’m B positive, should I eat chicken or fish?” The health “gurus” who are promoting eating based on blood type claim it can keep you fit and make you look good too.
We all desire to look good and are drawn to beauty. Proverbs 31 offers some excellent beauty tips that we—male and female—all need to read. The verses summarize much of the wisdom found in the entire book of Proverbs. They present the true beauty of a wise woman who fears the Lord.

Here are 5 of her characteristics:

  • Trustworthy (vv.11-12). She can be trusted to do good and to not harm others.

  • Shrewd or wise (vv.13-18). She thinks through her projects and manages her time and resources wisely. This leads her to successfully complete them.

  • Generous (vv.19-20). She gives to the poor and needy—not apathetic.

  • Diligent (vv.21-25). She makes sure that all the bases are covered for her family. A smile is on her face and joy is in her heart because she has done her best to provide.

  • Speaks wisely and kindly (v.26). She talks the talk and walks the walk!

By looking at this woman’s characteristics, we see that a person’s true beauty springs from the soul. Her kindness, loving care, and passion all flow from her relationship with God (v.30). Let’s follow her example and clothe ourselves with “the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God” (1 Peter 3:4).

Jane's note:

By reading it, this woman is so beautiful, I have more to learn and more to keep up, the one thing I need to do is to fear the Lord, this alone have much things to do, more lessons to pass....

Saturday, December 26, 2009


The Gift Of The Solution
by Michael Charles Messineo
Thursday, May 17, 2007

You need to look inside for answers and trust what you find.

The wall of separation,
dividing right from wrong,
sometimes hides the moral path,
whose list of things is long.
The goals of desperation,
that push us to extremes,
sometimes runs from friendship,
confused not what it seems.
The list of admiration,
that ones that we compare,
pushes the false values,
away from truth or dare.
The gift of the solution,
the one we seek to win,
starts with our own thinking,
the answer deep within.

Jane's note:

Solution has always in our hearts, there is - when we wanted to, there isn't - when we run away from, a word could tell ... Willing

Friday, December 25, 2009

Christmas Eve

We had a simple BBQ dinner at Joe's house this Christmas Eve, Hansen brought a special made wok from Singapore, a holely wok, he made by himself, according to Christabel, Hansen spent a month to drill holes whenever he is free. He is a good carpenter, he likes to make things special and practical from something, each time I go to their house, I will definitely walk around their house to find something 'new' and get inspired, you will have surprise each time you go.

Hansen used this wok for their beach side BBQ in Singapore, this time he came to OPEN our eyes. When the charcoals were set, he put some in a shallow flower pot, then set the wok on top of it, he started cooking the prawns, like usual cooking, frying and stirring with spatula; "It is his dream to cook in the garden!" said Christabel, haha his dream came true yesterday.

Delicious food, feel the warmth of the BBQ, it's the greatest love connection. After the food, Marcia got ready many small gifts, as our children's game rewards, how thoughtful she is, there were 8 in total, from two years old to 8 years old. They group in 2, made up 4 groups, racing to complete some tasks. It was so fun, and we enjoyed the time, and were amused by their expressions and spontaneous reactions. Oh definitely they liked the games, and I believe this is the greatest way building relationship and strengthening the bonds of attachment.

It was about 9pm after the game, we have decided to station back to Alex's home to have an early 'Boxing day', that was a mess.... the floor filled torn away wrapping papers, but looking at their faces and our faces, it is such a blessing to have all of them in my life, thanks to the Lord for His awesomeness!

Christmas is the season of love and connection, of course Jesus is the reason. Praise Him always.

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Avatar 3D Movie

The only one thing I can remember when I watched 3D action long ago, it has got to be 'headache' and it makes you want to vomit, ever after that very time ( about 12 years ago) I will never ever wanted to try it again, I will just say 'NO' to 3D movies.

Just last night, Debbie had got an invitation for free dinner and free screening of Avatar at GSC One Utama, she brought me along, I didn't know it was 3D at first, I wouldn't have gone if I knew it is. The first thought in me when I found out it is a 3D movie was 'Oh my, I just told my friends in last Saturday's meeting, I won't go for 3D movies, because it makes me want to vomit and gives me headache, and now I am in it..... oh, prepare to have an headache after this!'.

Nothing I can do, I can't just go home. Just some expectation in my head and prepare myself to get those sicknesses. We had the buffet dinner, then head to Hall 10, they served us free drink and a regular pop corn which quite a surprise to us, that was good, having everything for free, we got a pair of 3D spectacles before entering to the movie hall, the specs were cool, not those I knew and I wore, they were better quality in this high and revolutionary technology.

I was quite excited even before the movie starts, due to the
free food, free drink and free popcorn, ha! And it was really great when the movie started, my eyes opened wide and watched it clear, amazing with the pictures and drawings, the jungles, the animation, the lighting, they were fascinating, the most fantastic thing was, I didn't have any those sicknesses I mentioned earlier, I am totally alright with this 3D technology now, guess what? Debbie vomited! ooh, poor her.

Totally dwelt in the movie, this is a great movie, it is really surprise you and offer things you have never seen before, loved the trees, the flowers, the bugs, the floating lands, waterfalls, those six legs creatures, flying dragons (big birds), the moss lights up when they step on it, I like the most are those Atlantean people's mind got connected to every creature and plant in this jungle.

Go, go, go for this movie, it was super 'shiok', the story was great, the scenes were beautiful, those ideas were beyond our imagination, quite a long time since the film ended.... erm.... about 2 hours after the show now, I still 'don't want' to 'walk out' from the movie..... still thinking about the 'flying', I love flying......

If you want to watch 3D movie, here is the link I found that you could read the trick help you to avoid headache:

Trick to avoid headache when watching 3D movie

Thursday, December 17, 2009

What kind of attitude ...

You know, sometimes when we did something wrong, friend will confront our wrong doing according to Bible teaching through a 3rd party, what kind of attitude we usually react to this kind of advice?

I think my first reaction will be: ' Who are you? Mind your own business? Yes, I really did. You know what? I rather the friend confront me directly than telling other in the 'act of helping'. I have to admit, my attitude was proud and arrogant.

And I believe most of us will then follow by saying: 'Look at he/her own self, not a good one though, what have I done with him/her?', very quickly we will turn the missile back to their way of living, pint out their weaknesses... may be we will say: 'who are they to judge?'.

Exactly, 'Who are you to judge?', then I asked my sister about this incident, she got a very convincing and strong advice from her beloved husband - Hansen, he said: 'Open the Bible, read to them Proverbs 10:17, and tell them "I am not the one who speaks but the Lord", we don't have to live a perfect live to give you this advice, no body on earth is perfect, all of us falling short of the glory of God, we have to have humility and a teachable heart to accept friend's advice, of course, don't try to act 'helpful' by telling others, confront the person directly with love and encouragement.

Therefore encourage one another and build each other up,
just as in fact you are doing.

(1 Thessalonians 5:11 NIV)

Just recently, I dug out all that have been hidden in my heart for quite some times, feeling 'lighter' now,!

Thursday, December 10, 2009

Friends & Lovers - Chapter 2 part 2

Now we know what not to do. This, however, is just half of the story. The other half is much more positive. How can a husband and wife create a relationship with great communication? What can be done to start it up and keep it going? How can we talk like never before?

How to Build Communication

1. Seek to Synchronize

Communication is an all-the-time thing, not just something we do in times of crisis. Too many of us get out of tune with our spouses and wait for problems to force us back into harmony. Instead, we should develop an ease and constancy of conversation that is rhythmic and instinctive.

How can we develop this kind of daily dialogue? Work at it all the time, every day: Talk as you dress for work or church, as you drive together, at mealtimes and during other regular activities. Much good can be done during "coffee time" or any time when we can get a few minutes during the day. Such times form the fabric of a great marriage.

2. Spend Special Seasons

In addition to daily times conversing, we need to regularly carve out larger blocks of time to spend together. Take walks or go bike riding with one another. Get the kids to bed early and spend a quiet evening alone at home. Busy schedules make this a challenge, but we strongly urge that you retire for the evening at the same time. This provides a natural opportunity to wrap things up by spending a few minutes catching up on the day's events - this can also lead to other exciting forms of communication as well! Get away together overnight. You don't have to wait until anniversaries or birthdays - just pack a bag and go! It doesn't take a huge amount of planning or money to spend an evening at a nearby hotel or bed and breakfast. And even one night away can seem much longer when you learn to relax and enjoy yourselves.

3. Be Refreshingly Real

To have a friendship, couples must talk heart-to-heart. When we lose the deep bonding of our souls, marriage becomes stale, empty and lifeless. We may perform a daily routine, but that's all it is - a performance-there is little or no satisfying intimacy and friendship. Somewhere along the way we become superficial. We no longer talk with each other; we merely exchange information. And when we reach this point, both of us are prime candidates for adultery.

4. Learn the levels

In this book The Friendship Factor Alan Loy McGinnis points out that there are three levels of communication: facts, opinions and emotions. To have a close marriage, it is imperative that we learn to communicate truthfully and openly on all three levels. To help understand this, consider this scenario:

Fact: Husband is late for a lunch date with his wife.
His opinion: "This is my secretary's fault. She always hits me with something just when I'm ready to leave. But, I still might have made it on time if I hadn't stopped at that stupid newsstand on the way to the car."

Her opinion: "Late again! He could have left work sooner if he really wanted to. He just takes me for granted. This is just another example of his lack of love and consideration for me. And he's not even going to listen to me if I try to tell him how I feel. I wonder if he even loves me anymore. Oh, maybe it is all my fault-I'm always nagging him about something."

His emotions: (1) anger at his secretary (2) anxiety about his wife's possible reaction and (3) guilt brought on by his opinion that he could have been on time.

Her emotions: (1) anger (2) hurt (3) hopelessness caused by her opinion that he will not listen to her (4) fear that he does not really love her anymore and (5) guilt caused by her opinion that she may be too critical of him.

Are you as lost as I am on all this? Is it any wonder that the simplest of human events can become so terribly complex and that a minor problem can erupt into a major crisis?

Many situations become more difficult because men and women usually communicate on different levels. Facts and opinions are paramount to a man; whereas emotions and opinions are vital to a woman. "Can't we just stick to the facts?" protests the husband. "Why are you so unfeeling?" replies the wife. To argue this way is futile-it is attacking the person, not the root problem. Instead, we need to work with our spouses. We should recognize and understand on which level they are communicating and then help them to understand where we are. When we do, we are on our way to a marriage blessed with outstanding communication.

5. Lighten up

Many of you believe that anything to do with communication is by nature negative. In your minds it always means dealing with something difficult, tedious, unpleasant and hard. No wonder you dread anything akin to deep conversation! Or, if you are the "heavy," this is why your spouse groans whenever you want to "have a talk."

"Deep" doesn't have to be draining or depressing. Honesty is far more than just gut-wrenching confessions or an exploration of the dark side of your soul. Communications goes beyond talking about problems, disagreements and unpleasant experiences. It also means expressing out love, our appreciation and our respect for each other. It includes sharing the good news and good things in life with each other. Enjoy some laughter, share some memories, talk about your dreams, share your hearts...and lighten up!

6. Speak Silently

Words, phrases and sentences form only a small part of how we communicate. We convey much more with our attention, our expressions, our tone of voice and our touch.

Attention. Gaze at your spouses when you talk to them. Give them your complete attention. Look into their eyes-not just in their general direction. This let them know you are listening and care. It is frustrating to speak to someone who is preoccupied-reading the paper, staring at the TV, stirring something in a pot, or drifting aways in thought. If the conversation is light, then we can afford to listen as we go about doing something else, but we must be sensitive as to when to stop what we are doing and give our full attention to our spouses.

Expression. Look at your spouse with a warm, friendly expression. A blank stare communicates boredom. The tight-knitted brow conveys preoccupation or weariness in listening. The sarcastic sneer indicates disrespect. Need I go on? Get your heart into the conversation and a good expression on your face!

Tone. The same words spoken in different tones can have different meanings and different effects. This is the place so many of us stumble in our communication skills. "Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones" (Proverbs 16:24).

Touch. Since we who are married are "one flesh," we ought to touch freely and frequently.

7. Show Common Courtesy

Life is not lost by dying! Life is lost
Minute by minute, day by dragging day,
In all the thousand, small, uncaring ways.
Stephen Vincent Benet

Little things make a big difference. Life does not consist exclusively of great events-it is made up of a myriad of small, seemingly unnoticed moments. Often it is not the one big injury that ruins a marriage-it is the accumulation of small hurts and discourtesies over time. Solomon said it long ago: "Catch for us the foxes, the little foxes that ruin the vineyards, our vineyards that are in bloom" (Songs of Songs 2:15). Let me suggest some ways to catch the "little foxes" of discourtesy:

Express appreciation.
Do small, unexpected favours.
Lighten the load
Compliment appearance.

8. Share the Spiritual

"For where two or three come together in my name, there
am I with them"
(Matthew 18:20)

Help each other spiritually. Share encouraging verses from your own study of the Scriptures.

9. Practice the Praise Principle

Finally, brothers, whatever is true,
whatever is noble, whatever is right,
whatever is pure, whatever is lovely,
whatever is admirable-if anything is
excellent or praiseworthy-think about such things.
(Philippians 4:8)

Focus your thoughts on the good qualities in your spouse. If you occupy yourself with the pure, the lovely, the admirable, the excellent and the praiseworthy characteristics in your mate, then you, and they, will reap a benefit.

It has been observed that it takes five compliments to offset the effect of one criticism. When you give compliments, watch your spouse-and your marriage-blossom before your eyes.

10. Faithfully Forgive

Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances
you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you
(Colossians 3:13)

~ *;* ~

These are the basics on communication. Understand them. Work on them. Master them. Communication takes work and commitment. Those who are lazy will have no success. But when you care enough to communicate, you help your wife or husband feel your love. Listen to Paul's great statement about love in 1 Corinthians 13 and notice how so much that he says is directly related to communication and the principles we have talked about in this chapter:

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres (1 Corinthians 13:4-7).

If you don't communicate, you don't love. If you don't embrace these qualities of love, you will never communicate. According to a best-selling book, men seem to be from one planet and women from another, but God has a plan for us to share our lives with one another, and his plan will produce rich and rewarding results.

Friends & Lovers chapter 2 Can we Talk? part 2

Friends & Lovers - Chapter 2 Can we talk? part 1

Can We Talk?
How is the communication going in your marriage? Do you know and understand your spouse? Do you talk on a deep level, or do you limit your conversation to the superficial and mundane? Do you find yourself holding in what you would like to say? Are you frustrated? Are you afraid to talk about what is most important? Do you have difficulty putting your thoughts and feelings into words? Do you find that you are not even sure what your feelings and thoughts are? Is your idea of an open exchange limited to having an intense confrontation? When is the last time you had a heart-to-heart discussion with your spouse that was more than an angry scene? Are there things you have lied about to your spouse or deliberate withheld from him or her? How often do you just sit down and talk?

Let's face it: it is usually men who hold back in communication.

Our message to you is that is does not have to be this way. You can change. Your spouse can change. You can build a relationship in which you communicate openly, consistently and deeply. It will take work. It will call for humility. It will demand self-denial and persistence. In a word, it will be challenging. But the rewards of a revived and renewed marriage are infinitely greater than the effort it will take to change.

But how do we do it? What are the attitudes, actions and habits that prevent real communication? What must we overcome to open the way to a true sharing of our hearts and lives? We will discuss in detail ten of the most common problems that can and will kill communication within our marriages.

Communication Killers

1. Failure to Listen
My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry. (James 1:19)

Communication is a two-way street. It is far more than merely saying what we want to say and getting our point across - it means listening as well.

The way to change is ... just change! Pledge that when your spouse addresses you, you will stop what you are doing, change your train of thought, look him or her in the eyes, and listen lovingly and attentively to every word. (Husbands: In preparation for this change, buy some smelling salts to use in reviving your wife when she faints from shock!)

2. Defensive Listening

He who answers before listening - that is his folly and his shame

( Proverbs 18:13)

Defensive "listening" is done not to hear and consider the words of our spouses, but merely to give ourselves time to prepare a response. We never really give their opinions or feelings serious consideration. We even finish our spouses' phrases for them, as if they needed our quick minds to help them make it to the end of a sentence.

The root of this problem is pride. We are defensive because we assume we are right most of the time.Have you ever stopped long enough to consider that your spouse could have a glimmer of insight? That he or she might even be right or have a better idea?

Learn how to respectfully and patiently listen to one another.

3. Disrespect of Viewpoint

A fool finds no pleasure in understanding
but delights in airing his own opinions
(Proverbs 18:2)

Many of us have the attitude that we are always right, and that we know more than everyone else, especially more than our spouses. We snap off quick answers. The main exercise we get is by jumping to conclusions! We feel free to contradict and correct our mates - often in front of others. We say things like, "What she really means is..." or " Forgive my husband, he's so..." This is rude and embarrassing, and reveals an attitude of disrespect. If you find yourself repeatedly improving or altering what your husband or wife is saying, you have a real problem. Actually, you probably won't "find yourself" doing it at all - it is a longtime habit hidden within a smug superior disposition. In all likelihood, this communication flaw will need to be pointed out to you; you are not likely to see it on your own.

4. Cutting, Critical Remarks

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths,
but only what is helpful for building others up according
to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen
(Ephesians 4:29)

The tongue that cuts, slashes and wounds is one of the most common, hurtful and lethal problems in marriage. It has many forms. It speaks with tainted tones of sarcasm and muffled mutterings of bitterness. It expresses itself with phony sincerity and with hurtful shouts, name-calling and cursing. It disguises its criticism with cruel humor, mockery and subtle jabs. And it shows itself in our body language of smirks, rolling eyes and shaking heads.

We justify ourselves in the name of honesty: "I always say exactly what I think." Or we subtly turn the tables: "Oh, I didn't realize you were so sensitive." In spite of how reasonable our excuses may sound to us, they right hollow as we consider the inspired words of Scripture, " not rude" (1 Corinthians 13:4-5)

Whatever the reason, there is never an excuse to speak in such a way as to retaliate, humiliate or denigrate. We must radically repent of such sinful speech.

5. Hinting

Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will in all things
grow up into him who is the Head, that is, Christ.
(Ephesians 4:15)

If rudeness is the weakness of some, obliqueness is the weakness of others. By this I mean an indirect, subtle hinting around what we really mean to say. We drop a hint here and there, then expect our mate to be a psychologist and mind reader rolled into one. And to top it off, if he or she does not figure it out, we get upset! We need to stop playing this selfish, immature game. It unfairly puts the burden upon our spouses to figure out what we already know and could express if we chose. It is a form of control and manipulation. If we are afraid to say what we mean, we need to muster the courage to speak our minds, remembering that our fears are usually fears of how we, not our mates, might be hurt.

6. Clamming Up

...Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and
do not give the devil a foothold
(Ephesians 4:26-27)

Some of us have a great way to avoid conflict - we clam up! We go for hours or days without really talking. When we are angry, hurt or afraid, we withdraw into a shell of self-protection. We simmer in anger, quiver in fear or wallow in self-pity. We solve nothing by this behavior. Shutting down can become a form of manipulation.

If something is troubling you, you should let your spouse know. You need to pick the right time and place, but you must talk it out, or it will degenerate into bitterness and resentment. You must trust God's plan, which I would describe this way: Get it out in the open, talk about it, solve it, and go on with life.

7. Blowing Up

A fool gives full vent to his anger,
but a wise man keeps himself under control
(Proverbs 29:11)

Anger is a dangerous emotion. Losing our temper, flying off the handle, and erupting into a volcanic rage is a serious and grave matter. How many times have we wished we could have reached out and seized our angry words before they struck their mark? How many times have we had to apologize for the wounds we have inflicted?

Some of us excuse ourselves with "Well, I do have a bit of a temper. It runs in my family, you know." Others of us are genuinely sorry, but feel enslaved to our anger. Still others of us use anger as a tool to intimidate, bully and get our way.

8. Grumbling, Griping and Complaining

Do everything without complaining or arguing,
so that you may become blameless and pure,
children of God without fault in a crooked and
depraved generation, in which you shine like
starts in the universe
(Philippians 2:14-15)

It is unpleasant to talk to someone who always complains. To continually complain about life - how unfair, how rotten, how difficult - can quite effectively drive our beloved away from us. Griping, like many other communication problems, is actually a deep-seated character flaw to which we are often blind. If we knew how unattractive it is (even though others sometimes join us in our griping) we would retreat from such talk with horror. Perhaps it will take a marriage partner or another person to help us see the ugliness of this awful habit. When they point it out we need to listen. They are speaking truth we need to hear.

9. Lying

Truthful lips endure forever,
but a lying tongue lasts only a moment
(Proverbs 12:19)

We can have no relationship with anyone to whom we lie. Our spouses cannot be close to us, nor we to them, if there is deceit of any sort between us. We may believe that we have gotten away with our deception, but it still separates us. Down in our hearts we know that he or she does not truly know us.

Are you careless with the truth? Do you lie about anything - even "little" things? We may think that a minor fabrication is fine, but if we lie about anything - no matter how large or small - we have undercut our relationship.

The best policy is to simply tell the truth - even if it makes us look bad. "Simply let your 'Yes' be 'Yes,' and your 'No', 'No'; anything beyond this comes from the evil one" (Matthew 5:37).

10. Distractions

Listen, for I have worthy things to say;
I open my lips to speak what is right
(Proverbs 8:6)

By distractions I mean the clamorous telephone, the ubiquitous TV, the intriguing Internet, the blaring radio and the isolating headset. All of these high-tech conveniences can prevent us from real and relaxing communication with our spouses.

Radical steps must be taken to protect our relationships from all these competing intrusions.

But just reading through this list will not change your marriage. You must take these things seriously. You must treat them as a threat to your relationship and make sure they are put out of your life.

Friends & Lovers chapter 2 Can we Talk? part 1

Friends & Lovers - Chapter 1

I am reading this book, and wanted to share with you some of good points.

Friends & Lovers by Sam and Geri Laing
Discipleship Publications International
His mouth is sweetness itself;
he is altogether lovely.
This is my lover, this my friend,
O daughters of Jerusalem.
Song of songs 5:16
Best friends. Exciting lovers. Rarely has the heart and soul of marriage been summed up any better. Friendship and romantic love are the two essential ingredients of a great marriage, the qualities that will make it grow ever richer, deeper and more fulfilling. Although thisshould be the norm, few of us grew up seeing such marriages, and perhaps even fewer of us believed that we could experience such a relationship ourselves. Many have seen marriage as a drain rather than a fountainhead, a battleground instead of a refuge, and a pit stop rather than a permanent home.

Put aside your preconceptions, your problems and your past. Above all, get rid of your low expectations. A marriage relationship between two people who are friends and lovers is not just for the gifted, the beautiful or the few. It is intended for everyone, including you. The only thing stopping you is your doubt. It is time to lay faithlessness aside and get on with the business of building your marriage.

Let us begin with the foundation. What role should marriage play in our lives?

  • Our Lifetime Companions
The Lord God said, "it is not good for the man to be alone.
I will make a helper suitable for him"
Genesis 2:18

Our spouses should be our best friends on earth. They should know our minds, hearts, souls and feelings more than anyone else does. They above all others, are the people whom we love to b with, talk to or just sit in silence with, and with whom we share life's day-to-day experiences, heartbreaks and joys.

  • The Foundation of Accomplishment
If we are married, the strength of that marriage is the basis of a powerful, effective life. Our ability to accomplish is magnified amazingly when we have our spouses at our sides supporting us and working with us. Happy are those who recognize that marriage is teamwork, that we are better together than we are apart! If you look carefully, you will see that most of us marry someone quite different from us in temperament and personality. This is by God's design and is a part of the genius and mystery of marriage - although we all have weaknesses, our spouses' strengths can often make up for them. Working together as one, we each become the person we never would have become on our own.

  • The Fulfillment of Our Sexuality
For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife,
and they will become one flesh.
Genesis 2:24

Sex is one of the most powerful forces in the world. It is inspires, frustrates, satisfies, mystifies and torments us. God created sex and sexuality. He made us male and female, and instructed that we become "one flesh." If you have not yet figured out that those words are talking about sex in marriage please read on! God did not make a mistake when he invented sex - it was a part of the great design - a design to perpetuate the human race, to give himself glory, and to give us joy, happiness and fulfillment.

The marriage of a man and a woman who become lifetime friends and lovers is God's plan for our sexual contentment. It is a great plan, an ingenious plan, a plan that works in real life; and it is high time many of you married couples began to enjoy it!

  • A place to Build a Family
God blessed them and said to them,
"Be fruitful and increase in number;
fill the earth..."
Genesis 1:28

Family is to be the fundamental unit of all society.

~ *;* ~

Friends and Lovers! That is God's plan for marriage. We are to be best friends for life. We are to accomplish together what we could never do alone. We are to have an exciting, fulfilling sex life. We are to raise our children to be persons of character and integrity who will be a blessing to us in our old age. What God plans, he enables. What an awesome plan and what a great promise!

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Mistakes help us grow

I had this experience, long time ago, a female friend came to me, and mentioned to me some 'problems' of a male friend of us had last time, say about 'problem = sin', and this female friend asked me what do I think about this male friend now? (Indeed, this action I called GOSSIP), so what exactly I told the female friend was: 'We are here to not judge this male friend's behavior, anyhow, 'It' WAS his problem, may be he had this problem before he accepted Christ, or even if he still had this after the conversion, we never knew what God is doing in his life, he might be fighting and struggling to make the change! Who are we to judge and to condemn? Let him alone settle with God, like we settle our problems to God. We forgive as Christ forgives our sins.

I had another experience, have you heard of the Chinese saying? ”一次不忠百次不用“ means 'You are useless once you've failed' (hopefully I am correctly translated), a person looses a chance to in charge of a duty because of his past. Once a sinner always a sinner? I wanted so much to voice out my opinion, but I stopped, the most obvious reason was their comments on the person out of their condemnation and judgmentalism, I am just a little woman, a single mother, in another word a divorcy..... better keep quiet, haha (what am I doing? laughing? No, just try to end this sentence in a 'soft' way.)

What would Jesus do? I believe you know better than me. Like Peter, he denied God three times, and Paul, he killed Christians, God used them mightily, and even did things greater than anyone; like Mary Madeline, Jesus even mentioned that her deed is being recorded and remembered.

Mistakes help us grow! I forgot when have I started changing my attitude being gracious and mercy on people's wrong doing (I am sure this is what God wants!), of course not changing overnight, time to time, day by day, from my dearest sister, from Pastor Jacinta, from Jesus.

Thanks to all precious teachers in my life!

Monday, November 30, 2009

Life + Experiences = fear?

Experiences are our best teacher, they enrich your life, they colour your days, they fill your every minute with surprise.

Reading might help us to understand more, and seeing it in a wider angle, like Dr. James Loh has once said in his facebook status: ''Those who love to read and read widely usually do better in life all round.'' I agreed with that.

Never cease to read and experience, both could help you living a better life.

But fear has nothing good to bring to your life.

Fear of esperience of life?

I have ever thought: ''Look at the marriages of friends around me, sucks! Does this mean I will have a sucks marriage too?''

''Look at those who suicide, does this mean I will suicide too?''

''Look at those failure, does this mean I will be one of them?''

Unlikely, many things came together to make one like them, it all depend on how you take things, and how your understanding level, and how your attitude is, and how your ability to handle it.

Whatever comes, treasure them, whatever goes, let them go, and learn from them.

And most importantly, don't let FEAR haunt you from EXPERIENCING LIFE.


无论你的性格有多坦白, 多直率, 多开朗, 在某个时候, 某个地方, 某件事, 对某些人, 某些情感, 总有说不出的秘密, 赞成吗? 异议? 别摔啦, 想清楚, 这可没什么不正常, 我们是人啊, 许多时候, 人本来就对自己的情感不坦白, 因素只有一个, 害怕.

我 ~ 心里深处的秘密...多的很, 别以为读我的部落格可以知道我的秘密, 告诉你, 部落格可以说的都不是秘密, 哇哈哈! 说真的, 有秘密才叫做真正活过, 嗯...再说深一点, 生命中有秘密的人, 才真正为自己活过! 很牵强吗?哇~! 数一数... 我还真的为自己活过, 精彩, 哈! 太多的秘密了! 不为人知的, 只给好朋友知道的, 有些只给爱人知道的, 有些只给过客知道的. 吖! 又想一想, 家人知道的可真少呀! 也没关系, 无论怎么样, 家人还是我生命中最重要的, 甚至不可缺的.

人一生中的秘密, 一点一点的储存在上帝为我们预备的心盒里, 偶尔向上帝说说我们的故事, 整理一下, 回味一番. 千万别为它们感到遗憾, 或悲伤, 它们不需要这些.... 它们也许希望我们好好学习对自己的情感多一份了解, 早点学会对它坦白, 不要再把秘密塞进拥挤不堪的心盒里...就是给它们最好的安慰了.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Coming back

I stopped praying ever since the joke happened, just felt restless, and discouraged, I stopped doing devotion ever since then, and the feeling of not attaching with God (though I know He is always with me, He is in me.) is so helpless, hopeless, strengthless and dry, no direction ( in growing spiritually) battling and wrestling in many thoughts, even a tiny little thing...

I ... should say, allow myself went wild, gone astray, brought hurts, didn't care much how people feel, didn't care much what consequnces will come, just do what I want to do, life is short, enjoy every moment, in terms of doing what I feel like to do. That moment or the period of time wasn't that fun, wasn't that happy, I should say I felt guilty more then any other feelings.

Where have I been? somewhere ... that my sense told me is way too far, standing on the cliff, somewhere if you jump you will never come back, at least I know my spirit will diagnose with cancel cells and never healed. Though I know God is a forgiving God, I just don't want to do this for granted. Thank God for He has given me a heart, a God-fearing heart.

Now I am back, coming back, with His mercy, His amazing grace, His Spirit has led me here again...

To be able to enjoy His greatness, His fullness, His abundance. His glory has once again shine brightly in me.

"Arise, shine, for your light has come and the glory of the Lord is risen upon you!"
--Isaiah 60:1

Jane Lee

Not about what we want

At the very moment, thing seems to be simple when your action is decided by your feeling, you just do what you wanted, what you feel like doing it... that makes you feel great, and your day is beautiful, you've done what you feel like to do it.

I don't like to make things complicated, but I do believe there are consequences in every move we make.

When Gab was small, he always winded for something he wants, but I rejected him by a very good reason: 'No, I can give what you need, not that what you want.' I also believe God will do this to answer our prayers, when my prayer is not answered, there are two possibilities: 1) Wait, now is not the time yet; 2) No, this is not what you need;

Spirit, Soul and Mind, always good to keep spirit stand firm with God's word, let the spirit leads. Our soul and mind always tempted with what we want and what we feel good about, they always fall, they will have conflict sometimes, we always have a choice to make a dicision, which one you are leaning on? God's word or your feeling?

Overcoming is a progression, not easy as I thought, not tough as you have imagined, just understand well.... not about what we want!

Jane Lee


I was told the goodness about enzymes earlier ago, but just didn't border to listen and make it, till one of the parents came and share about enzymes and email me more about it, I started to try making those.

Yesterday was the day of 'harvesting' my first DIY garbage enzymes, with the use of a big sieve and a funnel to help fill into small bottles. Three months ago, I have made two combinations of enzymes, one is vegetable enzymes (which in the month of Aug, I cooked three days a week, without 'wasting' the left over and unwanted dried leaves and pips, I used it to make vegetable enzyme), another combination is fruits garbage enzymes ( fruits skin, pips, riped fruits, dried fruits - mainly lemons, pears, pineapples), I did have one Banana fruits garbage enzymes, this one smell good too.

Fruit Enzyme or DIY Enzyme, there are two types, fruits enzyme for daily consumption, another is garbage enzymes which is what I am making, for housekeeping usage.

I used to have lemon/pineapple enzymes apply all over my face and body once a week since October, that help even out skin's colour and tone, fruits enzymes is a skin refining properties. That have the ability to digest dead skin cells on the surface of the skin, improve skin texture, revealing a smooth, fresh appearance.

After done all the filling up, pour some in a small container diluted with water, about 1 to 10 ratio, then use it for hand mopping the floor and tables, and I also use this enzymes to remove stubborn oil stained in frying pan, it worked amazingly, it just gone, then I sprayed the toilet tiles, and wash toilet just with that, wonderfully clean. Another amazing thing is, my hands didn't feel rough and dry after all the cleaning.

Friends,, never too late to start, here it is...

How to make fruits garbage enzymes:

For garbage enzymes, use any fruits that has been in the fridge for far too long or skin of fruits you are about to throw away to make this enzymes.

Making garbage or eco enzymes is very useful in a long run. Remember the ratio 3-1-10, three parts of unwanted fruits, one part of sugar, use 10 parts of water to make this enzymes.

  1. Fill water and sugar in a bottle, stir and mix well till the sugar totally dissolved.

  2. Slide in 3 parts of unwanted fruits.

  3. (then put it in the bottle for three months, and if you have skin disease pour a little bit of enzymes in a small tupperware, then dip your hand inside each day a time.) {Gab typed this sentence, cos we used this to dip his finger's infaction in June}

  4. Remember in the first two weeks, stir it once in three days. Close the lid but not too tightly. As mentioned by Gab, keep it fermentation for at least 3 months.
Even I don't have enough fruits, I may add it up at ease, fermentation date starts when it is filled up to the required portion. Or I may keep those fruits in freezer, both ways work.

Jane Lee

Monday, November 23, 2009

Strawberries and Yogurt Smoothie

A fruit and yogurt smoothie is a quick, easy and healthy drink that all children would ever wanted.

  • 1/2 cup of strawberries
  • 3/4 cup of yogurt
  • 1 cup milk
For tastier: (Optional)
  • 1 tsp sugar
  • 1 table sp strawberry syrup
Put all of the ingredients into a blender and puree them together until smooth. Also, a banana may be needed to get the smoothie to the right consistency (thick and creamy).

Friday, November 20, 2009

After the fight is over

After the fight is over

By Dr James Dobson

It’s not the fights that should worry married couples; it’s what happens when the battles are over. Almost all husbands and wives experience conflict, which is not necessarily unhealthy to their relationships. A verbal spat that stays within reasonable limits can open the windows and give the couple a chance to vent frustrations and release some steam. The important questions, however, is what happens after a fight is over.

In healthy relationships, confrontation ends in forgiveness, in drawing together, and in deeper respect and understanding. But in unstable marriages, conflict is never entirely resolved. When the consequences of one battle begin to overlap with a prelude to the next, it becomes a very dangerous situation. It’s a good idea for couples to take a close look at what happens in the aftermath of confrontation.

Are there things that you’ve said or done that have grieved your partner? Do you need to ask forgiveness for attacking the self-worth of your spouse instead of focusing on the issues that divided you? Are there substantive matters that haven’t yet been resolved? Deal with them quickly before they fester and erode the relationship from within.

Remember the old saying – Don’t let the sun go down on our anger. That’s great marital advice.

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Ice Drip Coffee

Went by Jaya 33 business center, took a short look around flea market, saw this small stall, selling all kinds of coffee filter, and met the promoter Jean, she is nice and friendly, she explained to me some differences on coffee beans, and introduce this Ice-Drip Coffee maker, and that drew my attention indeed.

Here are some products on the table for sale, by Coffee Ritual @ Section 14, Petaling Jaya, you may contact them in this phone number 03 7956 1080


A unique ice drip coffee maker that slowly brews coffee, one drip at a time, brews cold coffee in 6-8 hours. It could store in refrigerator for weeks, and I tried that cup is stored more than a week, it tasted like coffee liquor.

Monday, November 16, 2009

GNC monoplax

GNC (Gabriel Ng Cinemax) does not have wide space of room, does not have leather arm-chair, and surround sound system, but it serves free milk-shake, provide blankies.. and pillows...

Last Saturday after SES chair-dance practice, me and Gab went for dinner at Maju-maju for Tosai, and I just had a glass of Teh-alia, Gab ordered strawberry milk shake.

The surprise was in the milk-shake, very super extremely sweet, even Gab did not take the 2nd sip, it was actually milk+1 scoop of strawberry ice-cream+condensed milk, that they call milk shake, RM3.50, and I took one sip, Gab took one sip, urghhh...! I poured in half bottle of mineral water, and it still tasted super duper sweet, we gave up the one!

Then I told Gab: "I know how to make milk shake, and mommy's milk shake is so much better than this one!". Gab suggested: " really? then we can watch DVD at home, ok?" Then we start planning for the our Saturday movie date.

"Ok, so I took my shower first, then your turn, while you are taking your shower, mommy make the milk shake......" I suggested.

Later, when came to his turn, he told me not to go into our room first, so I didn't, I went preparing the things needed to make milk shake.

Look for Home made milk-shake for things needed.

As soon as we got our milk-shake...

Then we walked into our room, "ta da...! " he sang this ... =.=", I have to co-ordinate with him and showed him the "suprised look" (keke, I am quite a good actor!) He got ready the blankies, and make a cosy seat with pillows, chosen a DVD ready to press the button. I remembered that time, when I was looking for the controller, Gab said: " ma, no need, you just sit down." then I saw his hand slip into blankie, held out the controller, and press the button, haha he is just too cute!.

So .. GNC is just 'shiioook'. He said he wants to charge RM5 per ticket, free milk shake, wonderful GNC! Gab had made the "Movie date at home" so special and unique.

Thanks to the Lord, because He has given me what I needed the most!

Jane Lee

Home made Milk-Shake

Here is what you need for Milk shake:

  1. UHT milk, a little, if you don't want to have waterly milk shake.
  2. Vanilla / Chocolate / Strawberry ice-cream 3 to 4 scoops
That is it... put them in a blender, blend them up! and ready to be served for one!

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

SonShine Playhouse

Today, I was invited to conduct 'creative time' for SonShine Playhouse by Justine Ng, thanks to her invitation, I am able to have a chance to share with parents and guide them to twist a simple balloon sculpture, the insect of the week is dragonfly.

SCF SonShine Playhouse is a playgroup run mainly by volunteer mothers in the church premises, to prepare a happy, safe and relaxed environment for little ones to learn life skills through plays, songs, musics and movement and story tellings, every Tuesday 9:30am at Dream Hub.

It was so fun to talk to those toddler... can be both challenging and rewarding, why did I say so? It is nearly impossible to get them to listen to you, most of the time they are not listening, some hopping around, some day dreaming, some just standing still and looking at you with their mouth open, some are still sucking their fingers, basically I was just talking to the parents, because I got parents replied in a *funny cute baby voice. Meanwhile have to talk like a kiddy child in order to make it interesting to those adorable toddlers.

The creative time (craft/handwork/library) starts at 10:30am, I was there at about 10:10am after sending Gabriel to my brother's house.

As I enter into Dream Hub, I saw them were dancing and singing, toddlers scattered all around the hall, do as they wish, I got a warm welcome from them by shouting "Hello Auntie Jane!'' My heart is warmed and my smile is sweet.

I hurried to fellowship hall, start pumbing balloons with the help of Esther, she is a volunteer helper as well as Kingdom Kidz's Sunday School Teacher, have been partnership with her from the very beginning of my serving.

There were total 15 toddlers, ballooning started as soon as they finished singing and dancing (morning exersice..haha). I have pre-twisted two balloon dragonflies, I called them My Pets, one named GreenPea, another named Orange, obviously one is in green and another in orange, purpose is to create a topic to start communicating... well, like I have said, mostly parent replied, haha. It was still fun to talk to them, to instruct them, they were good and took instrution carefully.

Most parents were afraid of twisting balloons, I saw many expressions from their face, they were brave for their children, then we came out the Bible verse "Be strong and courageous'', ''Be bold'' to encourage those mommies.

To make a balloon dragonfly, I use:

  1. Inflate one 260Q Qualatex tube balloon and leave about two inches uninflated in the tail end for body
  2. Inflate one small round balloon 5" inches in diameter, about half of the actual size.
  3. Inflate one 160 Thailand made tube balloon and leave about half inche for wings

Balloon Dragonfly twisting instructions:
Dragonfly's body
    1. Make an 1.5" bubble, then a loop (fold twist) that is big enough to allow the tube balloon to go through, then make a lock twist with the first bubble.
    2. Repeat the step '1' again, hence you will have one bubble, one loop, one bubble and follow by another loop in order.
    3. Take the end of the balloon and insert it through the 2 loops, continue to pull the balloon till it make a 'small handle' allow to fit in 'eyes' of the dragonfly.

Eyes of the dragonfly
    1. Get the center of the small round balloon, align with the nozzle to the center of the balloon.
    2. Use fingers to press the center of the round balloon, twisted to get two kidney shapes bubbles. Make sure the nozzle (knot) is hidden in the center of the twist.
    3. Slide in the two kidney shapers bubbles through the 'small handle' of the dragonfly body.

The wings
  1. Make a big loop by tying both ends of 160 Thailand made tube balloon together.
  2. Get the center point, left hand holds the nozzle, right hand pull the loop to another side to make get the center point, pinch with two fingers, pull it to the nozzle, then make a twist at the nozzle and the center point, you will then get an '8'.
  3. Attach the center of '8' balloon with the first bubble of the dragonfly body, twist the bubble around the center of '8' to tie them up, with some adjustment for the last step of ''Making balloon dragonfly'.

Kids were so excited holding their new pet cruising around the hall, 'kissing' each other, boys were having 'pet fighting'.

I am rewarded with a cup of black tea and a plate filled with swiss roll, crakers, biscuits, chocolates, and... arghhh, forgot. Of course the most rewarding is their lovely smiles, and hugs.

Ballooning is just one of the activities we have in Sonshine Playhouse, there are more crafts and acivities going on through the year. Visit SonShine Playhouse for more info.
Check out this Photo Album here!

Jane Lee

Sunday, November 8, 2009

~♥~ Lunch with Gab and Brian ~♥~

8th Nov, Brian and I brough Gab for lunch after Sunday service, an outing Gab and dad had after ...I think about 3 to 4 months ago... can't remember when was it.

Gab ordered his favourite- Cheese pita bread, and stick with daddy the whole session, hmmm... I am not jealous, I just felt... the place was so warm, why sat so near, haha it's ok, I know he missed daddy.

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~♥~ We had gread meal and fellowship in Restaurant Chilis ~♥~
Somehow, the food served here are better than TGIF.

Monday, November 2, 2009

Fleeing Temptation

Fleeing Temptation by Alan Smith

There are times when running away is the proper response. In his first letter to the Crinthians, Paul said to "Flee sexual immorality" ( 1 Cor. 6:18 ) and "Flee from idolatry." ( 1 Cor. 10:14 ). Fleeing is especially important when we encounter temptation. We sometimes make the mistake of putting ourselves in situations where we are tempted, thinking that we are strong enough to handle it.

Sometimes we are, but often we are not.

Remember when Joseph was tempted by Potiphar’s wife? She “cast longing eyes on Joseph and she said, ‘Lie with me.’” (Gen. 39:7). Joseph refused to commit adultery with her, but she persisted to the point that finally Joseph needed to flee. “He left his garment in her hand, and fled outside.” (Gen. 39:12).

There may not be a Potiphar’s wife in your life, but there is likely some temptation which you find difficult to resist. If alcohol is your temptation, flee. Make a decision to avoid people and places where alcohol will be readily available. If sexual impurity with a boyfriend or girlfriend is a temptation, flee. Make a decision to avoid situations where you are alone and the temptation is stronger. If inappropriate use of your money is a temptation, flee. Stay away from the mall!

The worst mistake any of us can make is to think that “I can handle it. I know this is a strong temptation but I won’t give in. I’ll hang around close, but I won’t cross the line.” The real question we need to consider is this: “Who (or what) do we want to stay close to?” Because fleeing is not just running away from something; it is also running toward something.

“But you, O man of God, flee these things and pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, patience, gentleness.” (I Timothy 6:11)

Father, more than anything in this world I desire to be close to you. Help me to flee from those things which tend to pull me away from you, and draw me close. In Jesus’ name, amen.

.*;*. ^ . ^ .*;*.

There is another article about Fleeing Temptation:


This is a long one, but it is good to know more.

Jane's Note:

Knowing me who always overconfident in thinking I can resist temptations and influences without fleeing.

Result shows that I am so vulnerable, and weak before temptations. From my experience and here I hope that you allow me to give you this caveat: ''Friends.... run away from the thing you called it temptations.'', and if you allow yourself live with it, not long you will find yourself falling in to commit the first sin, then one sin leads to another, therefore God says flee from it, He knows our weaknesses, it is never too late, now.... ''RUN!''

Jane Lee

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